If You Love Me, Never Let Me Go - Christmas One-Shot
by TheBruhTheGenieAndTheYam
Summary: It's Christmas time in the Phan household, what could go wrong?


"Dan! Dan!" screamed Phil who was furiously running down the stairs. Dan rubbed his eyes as he got off from the popcorn filled couch, the television was still on and was now showing an old episode of a cartoon they both used to watch.

Dan groaned and stood up, "What?" he said, seeming puzzled at the fact that the lounge was up in Christmas lights and that the fireplace was burning. "Okay, Phil, what's going on?"

Pieces of popcorn jumped as Phil plopped down on the couch and gestured for Dan to sit back down. Dan rolled his eyes and decided to settle down next to his beau. Phil laughed, a sparkle in his eyes. "It's Christmas Eve!" Phil pouted. "Don't you _dare_ tell me you forgot!" Dan smiled and shrugged, turning his attention towards the television.

"Where's the remote?" he asked. Phil gestured to the coffee table, and Dan reached forward and grabbed the remote. He turned on the television and flipped through channels, until finally finding the news channel.

"Welcome to V-A-N news.", said the reporter. "Today, we bring you the story of a girl arrested for the murder of Samuel Lombard, a member of the band Van Goth." On the screen appeared a few pictures of a tall lean man, up on stage, obviously enjoying the attention from the crowd.

Dan squinted at the screen. "Do I know him?" Phil shrugged, but Dan paused the television. He looked confused, but eventually put the remote down and wrapped an arm round Phil. "That's one way to start Christmas Eve." Phil happily cuddled up to Dan, and they watched _Doctor Who_ for the rest of the morning.

Dan was asleep when Phil was woken up by a terrible headache; a striking, dull pain in the back of his head. He stood up, almost waking Dan, and walked to the kitchen. He took a huge crystal-clear glass out of the cabinet and poured himself some water. He held the glass to his lips and chugged it all in one go.

His headache was gone, but he was still thirsty. He poured himself another glass of water and went to sit down next to Dan, who was still snoring. Phil smiled and set down his glass on the coffee table and sat next to Dan. He dug the remote out of the deepest depths of his couch and switched the television. It was already on the news channel.

"The murderer of Samuel Lombard has been caught," said a different reporter from earlier, an anxious expression on his face. A picture flashed onto the screen of some security footage taken near the scene of the crime. A short girl, no older than 16, was seen wearing all black running away with her hands stained red, which Phil assumed was blood. She was holding a small pistol in her hand, and a dagger could be seen in her pocket. _If only her hair hadn't been so bright,_ _she'd have gotten away with it,_ he thought.

"Her name is Maureen, her last name is undisclosed by the police department for privacy reasons," said the reporter, looking down at a sheet of paper. Phil mouthed the murderer's name, as if he was testing it. He blinked, confused at the familiarity of the name. He looked at her picture. Her face looked very familiar, but her hair was different. He wondered if he had seen her before, maybe on the streets or… in a coffee shop? Perhaps it was just his mind playing tricks on him. The reporter continued, a solemn look on his face, "The trial will be held next week, at 9 AM. If you wish to attend, more details will be posted on our website, at ."

Phil sighed as he starting switching between multiple channels. He finally decided on a documentary on the origins of rock music. He felt Dan snuggle up against him, pressing his nose against Phil's shoulder. Phil closed his eyes and took a deep breath, while smiling. His perfect life didn't have murders or trials or any sort of drama. The only thing he had was Dan, and he loved it. He snuggled up to Dan and slowly let his heartbeat lure him to sleep.

Phil woke up to the smell of hot chocolate. He sat up, his head aching, as Dan walked into the room. Dan smiled as he carried a tray of two piping hot cups of hot chocolate.

"Ohhh-what's this?" Phil asked as Dan set the tray down on the coffee table.

"Nothing, just something I thought should start up our day."

Phil picked up his mug, taking a sip. It burnt his tongue, but it tasted delicious, so he kept taking small sips. Dan took his mug and the television remote and pressed the on button. The news' set had been heavily decorated with red and white tinsel, a bit overdone if he did say so himself (and he did say so) but Phil seemed to enjoy the bright and colourful decorations.

"Merrrrrrrry Christmas!" said the reporter, she was wearing a bright red outfit paired with a silver santa hat, almost camouflaging with the set background. She continued, "Today's topic is the ongoing fight for justice, for Samuel Lombard, a member of the popular band, Van Goth."

The reporter continued to speak but all Phil could hear was muffling. Dan still sat next to him, smiling and taking sips of his hot chocolate, talking about something.

Phil couldn't hear.

 _What?_

 _Ow._

 _That pain?_

 _burnachescratchburnachescratchburnachescratchburnachescratch_

 _alone._

 _lostlostlostlostlostlostlostlostlostlost_

 _shaking-_

"Phil?" asked Dan, shaking him by the shoulders. Phil snapped back to reality and faced Dan. He stared at his face for a while, realizing how deep his eyes were and planted a kiss on his lover's lips. As they pulled away, Dan smiled. "Well Merry Christmas to you to."

Their Christmas tree had been shining bright this year, especially now in the evening. The multi-coloured lights they had bought not on-sale may actually be worth their price. Their lounge was illuminated with a soft glow, even with the brightness of the lights. A Christmas album was set on the vinyl player, as Dan and Phil opened each other's gifts. They hadn't been able to go to their families due to a massive crowd of people trying to buy tickets all at once (even online!), so, they settled for staying here for Christmas day, then going to their respective families on New Year's Day.

They sat down by the fireplace and began to open each other's gifts. Since it was only them two, they decided that they'll buy multiple gifts for the other person on compensate. They took turns in opening the presents as Dan kept track of all of them on his phone.

First, Phil got a small seal plushie; Dan got a completely black wall clock which he said "would match his aesthetic perfectly."

Next, Phil opened up a box filled with multiple gift cards, including Starbucks, Steam, and his favourite clothing store; Dan got a new pair of black skinny ripped jeans, somehow blacker and more distressed than his other pair.

Finally, Phil decided to let Dan go first and he obliged. Dan picked up his last present, a small box, a tore the wrapping paper right off. It was a small, black velvety box. Curious, Dan opened it up right away, to reveal a simple silver ring, with a small diamond placed on top. He picked it out of the box.

"Phil-"

Phil silenced him with a finger to his lips, he got up, then back down but this time on one knee and said, "Daniel James Howell, will you marry me?"

Dan stood up, "I would-"

"NOT!"

Suddenly, the scenery changed from their lovely London flat lounge to a dark room. Phil was suddenly strapped to a chair, still in his Christmas pajamas. Dan was still in front of him, next to a familiar face. In his hand, was the ring. Dan laughed, almost evilly.

"You really think I would marry you?" He scoffed, placing a hand on the person next to him. Blood dripped from his forehead onto his plain white shirt. _It couldn't be-_

"Aren't you _Samuel Lombard_?" Phil asked, wanting to know but at the same time-he didn't.

The person nodded. It was him. Sam laughed.

"Congrats Philip, you finally figured it out."

"But I-I-I," Phil stuttered, "Y-you're d-dead?"

Samuel picked up a gun from the table right next to him. It wasn't a big room at all, it barely fit the three of them and the table. A ocean of thoughts inundated Phil's head.

 _Am I going to_

 _diediediedieidiediediediediediediediediediediediediediediedie_ _？_

 _Gun_

 _Trigger_

 _Gun_

 _Aim_

 _Trigger_

 _Pull_

 _Gun_

 _Shoot_

 _diediediedieidiediediediediediediediediediediediediediediedie._

Phil shut his eyes tight, losing on of his senses and soon, he thought, he would lose all of them. But after a while he could still hear the malice filled laughs of Sam and Dan.

"Dan? Dan, what the fuck?", Phil muttered, rubbing his head. _This is all just a bad dream_ , he thought.

"If you think this is a bad dream, then what are your good dreams?" Dan asked, now holding a gun. The ring and the box had been placed right on top of Phil's head, almost like an apple. Dan stepped back and Phil looked behind him, the room suddenly became as big as a warehouse. Dan was now a good 3 meters away from Phil, he lifted his gun.

It was aimed at the ring.

"You-you don't need to do this," pleaded Phil, his eyes will still wide open, set on the gun.

Dan and Sam stood silent for a moment, before Dan put down his gun. Sam just stood by the table of weapons.

"You're right," Dan said, "I don't." Phil could almost feel the corners of his mouth curving into a smile.

"B-but," Dan continued, "I want to." And with one swift motion, he lifted the gun and squeezed the trigger.

 _Gun_

 _Trigger_

 _Gun_

 _Aim_

 _Trigger_

 _Pull_

 _Gun_

 _Shoot_

Phil opened his eyes, he was still in the same room as before but now Maureen stood across the room. He could hear his own head throb as he blinked to clear his blurry eyes. Maureen sat on a small table, examining a pistol.

"Maureen! Help me!"

 **A/N:**

 **Thanks for reading our Christmas one-shot! If you didn't get the ending, this scene occurs in Phil's head while he is passed out after Chapter 5.**

 **As a special gift for reading this Christmas special, we have curated a special Van Goth playlist on Spotify inspired by the band itself! The songs are what we think Van Goth's songs would sound like, so enjoy!**

 **/2B0KYFe** **(or search up 'Van Goth' on the Spotify application)**

 **Happy Holidays!**

 **TheBruhTheGenieAndTheYam**


End file.
